Out of the Blue

If a girl ever comes up to me and asks me to show her proof that God (not a specific one) exists, I would kiss her and say "Anything can happen....so expect the unexpected".

Big Fist Policy

"And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life". - JK Rowling

By no means am I at rock bottom, but at sometime, and sometime soon, I need to pick myself off the ground piece by piece. My life feels disheveled and unorganized so its merely a simple task of simplifying.  Simplify...because its impossible to find the zeroes and coincidental solutions until I accomplish the initial step. Family and grades should come first because one is irreplaceable and the other is irreversible.

Close your eyes... and then organize your life into a single file line in your mind with the line facing you so you only have to face one thing at a time. In the distance, you can see the plethora of issues awaiting decision, but for now, face the first concern and ask in the nicest voice possible "How may I help you?" If the first customer is a big problem, just tell him "Hey big problem, I got a big fist". And then shove that fist down its throat and yell "Next!!" Oh and don't forget to remember that your friends and family are standing right behind you holding you up against the oncoming tide of problems. 

I organize my life in these journals (real and unreal)...and i make them a mess, but only so my life wont have to be. It's a pretty cleansing feeling to empty my mind before I sleep. 

Pace of the Race

Strive for perfection. Although impossible to attain, set your goals high and be content with your accomplishments. Life is a race, just not to the end so enjoy the journey and live in the moment. It may seem as if everythings a competition, but its not. Everyones in the same race, but each person also has their own lane to go at his or her own pace. Don't worry about finishing because trust me, you will finish the race. You might as well work on your running form and enjoy the sights. Too much is taken for granted in this world and breathes are wasted in oblivion. Wake your senses and embark on life because the world is gorgeous and so are you. 

Bittersweet

I convinced myself that I didn't need you. Denial had the best of me until now. Denial just died and reality has knocked me to my knees. The world looks different from this height however and I've gained an additional angle and another perspective of the world to add to my armory. Every ounce of consciousness takes its toil as simple tasks become burdens with you on my mind. Innocent objects remind me of you and single breathes drag into long sighs of longing. I wish your affections were in line with mine and that this feeling was mutual, but sadly no. 

The only time you run out of chances is when you stop taking them. And you've ceased the tease and quit the risks so sadly there's no chance of potential. I hate that I loved you and I regret this ordeal.....but really I don't because you still reside in my heart. 

Lame is my name and fame is the game.

Life is so Precious

Relativity defines the meaning of everything. If a women with 10 gold coins loses one of those coins, she'll comb everywhere in search of what she's lost. And if she finds her lost coin, she will rejoice in finding what has been lost. A wealthy man however would not think twice after losing a single gold coin and would not feel sadness. This mere principle of relativity defines an objects importance, but on a larger scale and at a wider perspective, it affects everything. A single lost friend is worth trying to regain touch with, and a single stranger is worth helping because no matter how many coins you have, the value of each will always be constant. 

My father often repeats the words, "Life is so precious." Upon further investigation, nothing could be more true. 

Life is so precious that it is special and unique. Every single human being has characteristics and traits that define their personality and set them apart. 

Life is so precious that it is fragile. Life can be taken away in the sigh of a breathe. The world can come shattering down in a heartbeat and be leveled to rubble. Emotions and mentality can be tortured by heartache, loss, or loneliness. 

Life is so precious that it is rare. You are given but one life so make the most of it. You only live once, but if you work it out right, once is enough.

Life is so precious that.....it is just plain precious.... Thank you for life. Its the greatest gift I've ever received and I plan on putting it to good use.

My mother is a breast cancer survivor but often times I forget. It's silly but it almost feels like the entire ordeal never happened. Now looking back upon it, the strongest person in my family at the time was my mom. She never faltered once, nor showed the smallest sign of defeat. Each day, she woke up with the mentality that everything would be alright. And the next day, she woke up with the same exact mentality except with even more zeal and an even stronger will than the day before. Her diagnosis was the one event that brought my family closest together and we are stronger because of it. I remember her saying one day during her recovery that this was the first time that everyone in the family would do what she said without having to ask twice. I still vividly remember those humbling drives back and forth from Hoag Hospital in Newport Beach during her treatment. Her recovery room following her surgery had a gorgeous view and I remember my mom mentioning that this was the nicest room she'd ever slept in, but sadly under the worst circumstances. I love my parents so much and sadly, its taken me 18 years to realize it.

Love and religion are much in the same. They both expect you to believe in the intangible. Intangible though? That's the last word I'd use to describe love and religion because I feel ever emotion and every thought. It's that horrible butterfly sensation that sweeps me off my feet and sends me flying through the air that definitively convinces me of their existence. If that's not tangible, I don't know what is.  

How do you know love exists? You may say that you can just feel it in your heart. Does that make it any more tangible than religion? Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith, because fundamentally that is exactly what love and religion are; faith. Have faith in love, and have faith in religion because they both console the heart and can save the soul.

Christianity is a fool's bet. Absolutely absurd in basis and fact, it needs to be simplified into a mere faith. Don't expect too much and have a little faith. At the end of my life when upon my death bed, I'll think back to all the time dedicated or possibly even wasted to religion. But let's say that there's a 1 in a million chance of walking through the gates of a paradise and hearing the familiar voice of my parents again, call me a fool but I'll take that chance. No matter how small, you can even increase the odds to 1 in a trillion, but I'll still take my chances because in the end, what's there to lose? 

Never make assumptions and always expect the unexpected. One thing I've learned, is that this world is unpredictable and extremely complex. Absolutely nobody knows what lies after death so just take a leap of faith into the dark abyss and see where you land. There's absolutely nothing to lose.

When upon my death bed, if I were to beg and plead with God to let me live one more year, what difference would a crippled, incapacitated year be? What excitement would there be other than swimming through complex thoughts considering the inevitable in that bonus year? 

Now imagine you were given that bonus year right now? Imagine how you would live out that year? Well guess what, this is your bonus year, so go fulfill your fantasies and be thankful for every breathe for each is a gift. Life in its entirety is a gift so take nothing for granted and always be thankful.